Grief & Loss

Grief is not a problem to be solved. It is love with nowhere left to go, and it moves through us on its own timeline, often refusing the neat five-stage model we've been sold. Grief can be about death — of a person, a pet, a relationship, a dream, an identity, a sense of the world being safe. It can arrive in waves: quiet for weeks and then devastating on an ordinary Tuesday. It can look like tears, or numbness, or rage, or a strange inappropriate laughter. All of it is grief, and all of it is allowed.

Grief Is Not Just About Death

• Death of a loved one, including anticipatory grief before loss
• Divorce, breakup, or the end of a significant relationship
• Loss of identity through illness, disability, or major life change
• Miscarriage, infertility, or pregnancy loss
• Loss of a career, community, or sense of belonging
• Disenfranchised grief: losses not recognized or validated by others
• Ambiguous loss: grief for someone still living but changed (dementia, estrangement)
• Cumulative grief: layers of losses stacked over time

Complicated Grief

For some people, grief becomes prolonged and debilitating in ways that go beyond the typical grieving process. Complicated grief (also called prolonged grief disorder) involves intense yearning, difficulty accepting the loss, a diminished sense of identity, and an inability to re-engage with life. This is not a sign of weakness or excessive attachment — it often reflects the depth of the bond, the circumstances of the loss, or the absence of adequate support and ritual around grieving. Therapy can help create the space and witness that complicated grief needs.

How Therapy Supports Grieving

Grief therapy doesn't try to "get you over" your loss. It creates a space where the loss can be held fully — witnessed, spoken, and integrated rather than bypassed. Narrative approaches help people reconstruct meaning after loss. Somatic work helps the body process grief it's been carrying. IFS can help tend to the parts of you that are devastated, the parts that are numb, and the parts that want to protect you from the full weight of it. A therapist who has trained in grief can sit with you in the darkness without rushing you toward the light.